rac‧ism
–noun
1.a belief or doctrine that inherent differences among the various human races determine cultural or individual achievement, usually involving the idea that one's own race is superior and has the right to rule others.
2.a policy, system of government, etc., based upon or fostering such a doctrine; discrimination.
3.hatred or intolerance of another race or other races.
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Countries being inundated by illegal immigrants are being accused with acts of racism.
To be honest, it is the illegal immigrants themselves, many of which are non-Christian, and all of which do not integrate with the host country which are guilty of racism.
Why?
Read definition 1. ... usually involving the idea that one's own race is superior and has the right to rule others. We rule in our own countries because we have been born here, bought/inherited the property we live in and contribute to the country via our taxes. Our democratic system gives us to vote for representatives to rule over us.
Now, this illegal immigrant community builds up and starts pressuring for removal of Catholic symbols because they offend them. Isn't this an implementation of the above defintion? What gives them a right to decide what should be there and what should not? These come from non-democratic countries, they dont know what it means to live in a democracy. They think that they can get their religious leader to moan about it and have it happen. Well, I have my political leader too. And I voted for him to be there.
Does a Catholic symbol offend you? Well its absence offends me! And since the majority are like me, then WE decide.
Today I just heard that a Spanish school is cancelling Christmas celebrations to avoid offending non-Christian students. I tell these students: Stay home! Don't come to the Christmas celebration! Why should we not do it because you don't want it? You think you're superior?? If you do, then you're the RACIST!
Thursday, November 30, 2006
Nearby Detonations...
det‧o‧nate
–verb (used without object)
1. to explode with suddenness and violence.
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Many things can explode - not just suicide bombers or warship magazines... amongst which is the human psyche.
I have recently been shocked by such a detonation - a close friend of mine has lost himself to the computer world, putting it up and foremost before his newly formed family. Provocation caused him to explode suddenly and violently, causing his wife to file for separation.
I learnt of this from his wife - I havent heard from him for a long time. Needless to say, there is no excuse for any violence - thus I agree with his wife wholeheartedly.
The cause of his problematic psyche is an unstable childhood and an opressing parentage. He found his refuge in the computer world, where by hack or by crack (an online version of by hook or by crook) he can be king. He married not out of love, but to get out of his parents' house - wrong tactic dude: you just bought a ticket to LonesomeWood.
To you, mate, I beg you to seek psychiatric help: it's nonsensical to play all night and then not go to work the next day... where on earth did you get the idea that you can stay at home and let the money roll in? Get your act together mate, dont end up a slob. Sell your computer, get a free hobby like jogging or bird-watching, live life.
To all others, you have been given just one chance (unless you're Indian and beleive in reincarnation - but belief doesnt make it true) to live this life - dont waste it.
–verb (used without object)
1. to explode with suddenness and violence.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Many things can explode - not just suicide bombers or warship magazines... amongst which is the human psyche.
I have recently been shocked by such a detonation - a close friend of mine has lost himself to the computer world, putting it up and foremost before his newly formed family. Provocation caused him to explode suddenly and violently, causing his wife to file for separation.
I learnt of this from his wife - I havent heard from him for a long time. Needless to say, there is no excuse for any violence - thus I agree with his wife wholeheartedly.
The cause of his problematic psyche is an unstable childhood and an opressing parentage. He found his refuge in the computer world, where by hack or by crack (an online version of by hook or by crook) he can be king. He married not out of love, but to get out of his parents' house - wrong tactic dude: you just bought a ticket to LonesomeWood.
To you, mate, I beg you to seek psychiatric help: it's nonsensical to play all night and then not go to work the next day... where on earth did you get the idea that you can stay at home and let the money roll in? Get your act together mate, dont end up a slob. Sell your computer, get a free hobby like jogging or bird-watching, live life.
To all others, you have been given just one chance (unless you're Indian and beleive in reincarnation - but belief doesnt make it true) to live this life - dont waste it.
Thursday, October 26, 2006
On my daily visit to the CNN website, today I learnt of the death of Tommy Johnson.
I never knew about Tommy Johnson before.
He was a tuba player.
I never played tuba.
It's not what he was, but rather what he did that left an imprint in me. What did he do?
He was the tuba player of the Jaws theme.
Now, I am not a Jaws fan... but the theme song of Jaws is unique, instantly identifiable. A piece of music that instills dread and fear in the listener.
However it's not a song I listened to everyday. It was just another song.
But now, hearing this news of departure, has left an emptiness in me - knowing that that song can never be played the same ever again - because the man who originally blew his breath through the tuba to make that unique sound has left us.
God grant him eternal rest - and may I do something remarkable that will be liked by millions. Even a small breath through an instrument...
I never knew about Tommy Johnson before.
He was a tuba player.
I never played tuba.
It's not what he was, but rather what he did that left an imprint in me. What did he do?
He was the tuba player of the Jaws theme.
Now, I am not a Jaws fan... but the theme song of Jaws is unique, instantly identifiable. A piece of music that instills dread and fear in the listener.
However it's not a song I listened to everyday. It was just another song.
But now, hearing this news of departure, has left an emptiness in me - knowing that that song can never be played the same ever again - because the man who originally blew his breath through the tuba to make that unique sound has left us.
God grant him eternal rest - and may I do something remarkable that will be liked by millions. Even a small breath through an instrument...
Sunday, March 05, 2006
Victims of a Horrible Tripod
One of the worst tripods in human history consists of Politics, War and Progress.
Politics and/or Progress bring about wars. Wars bring about Progress. But then, Politics don’t bring about Progress directly – so we can never do without the Wars themselves.
The basic trait is this: if everything is running smoothly, do not progress. If you progress you might cause an imbalance, which can bring about war.
The problem is that politics themselves create imbalance, which then begets wars. During war, progress is then made to recover the imbalance and become an equal to or better than your adversary.And war doesn’t have to be violent, full-bloodied war.
Let’s consider telecommunications.
The telephone is something that can be found in every household and transports audio from one location to another via telephone wires. This idea was used to transfer data across such wires – but telephony had fewer requirements than data and an analog medium was enough – not so for digital communications. The next step was to change the medium: we have ADSL, Cable and now mobile technologies.
Notice the Progress:
Transport audio from one location to another via analog telephone wires.
Transport data from one location to another via analog telephone wires.
Transport data from one location to another via digital cabling or wireless.
How long will it take to complete the last step and make it as popular, as a necessity, as the first step has become in our daily lives?
Politics.
Yes – what? Make large companies such as BT, Maltacom crumble just for the sake of progress? What about employment, what about shares, what about votes?
And yet, what do we see in “futuristic” films, Back to the Future II just to mention one? A “phone call” actually consists of seeing your boss on your wall TV screen and hearing him firing you… Ok it’s not something you would want but focus on the technology: 2-way communication on your TV screen.
Look at our current situation: a solution exists for Web browsing where one can use the existing slow phone line to send commands, or rather URLs of webpages or data that is then sent down the fast cable medium to one’s TV via an appropriate TV set box.
TV. Television. Remote Vision. Where is it right now? Traditionally, an aerial on your building receiving data in the form of radio waves. Fine. Cable Television. For a higher price you can get digital video from a large selection of channels. Next. Satellite receivers can hook up onto an orbiting geostationary satellite and download digital video and audio data.
Ok. All this deals with reception. What about transmission? We all know that reception cost is less than transmission cost: of course – there is more demand for reception than for transmission: you want to see a movie to relax, not take all the hassle to make even one scene!
Transmission: hey have you heard of the Internet? It’s really easy to use and you can have your own virtual webspace where you can explain yourself to your clients and provide means on how to buy from you online even!
Technical people will tell you: yes it is very easy to create a static webpage once and for all. But maintaining a dynamic one which changes regularly is an ardous task.
And anyway who mentioned commercial transmission? I just want to see how my grandmother is – she can’t even read let alone use the mouse!
Fine. Let me mention something else: a webcam. Do you know how cheap a webcam is? You have a video camera already – even better: get a TV capture card – works the same.
Well?
Let’s throw all this into the cauldron, say the magic word and see what comes out shall we?
Turn on your TV. Sit on your couch. Grab your multi-purpose remote control. Press the number of your grandmother on the remote control: 123456789. On your TV you see a view into your grandmother’s kitchen and you can see her brewing some of your favourite soup. You can even hear her radio set. You put your remote control to your mouth, just like a handset, and press the call button. You see her putting the ladle by the side, go over to the radio set and turn the volume down. You then see her heading for her remote control, she presses a flashing button and puts her remote control against her face and answers you.
Your call turned on the TV set and is showing you through the webcam you have installed on your mantelpiece. You wave to her and her face brightens. You chat a bit. You show her the latest drawing your two-year old son has made and she loves it. Then you see her twitching her nose, and she turns round to the cooker. She leaves the remote control on the cupboard. A button at the back of the remote turns the handset to a speakerphone and you can hear her turning the cookerhood on….
Sounds nice doesn’t it? Of course some issues arise:
The webcam can control who can (relatives, family doctor) and cannot (thieves, anyone) look through the webcam. Firewalls?
The webcam will act like a webserver, acting on a well-known port. The client for this server will be the TV top device, using some common protocol. VDTP? (Visual Data Transfer Protocol).
The remote control will be a specialized mobile, which interacts with the TV top. It will have:
· Digits to type in the number to call
· A button to switch the TV of the client onto your webcam ( requesting an audience)
· The audio transmitted is in sync with the webcam and TV top device.
· A button at the back so when it is laid down it becomes a speakerphone.
All this cannot be used only for calling grandma. Here are some ideas:
Security: check your house from your place of work
Training: attend instructor-led lessons from home
Video-conferencing: nothing new.
Interactive TV anyone? How many more phone-in shows do we have to see to feel such a need? Why separate TV and phone? Why not into one?
Customer care? Call them at home and see how they are doing?
Over-the-phone help? Forget it, now the customer can show you the “broken down” iron and you can see that the knob is turned wrong.
Evil side? Violence? Pornography? Yes evil tends to seep into everything – but now no 12-year old can fool you into being an adult – you can see him from the webcam!
No more blind dates – see how your date looks like before meeting up.
Want to see the weather in Scotland before you pack your luggage? Tune in to a public weather webcam and check for yourself.
Afraid of traffic jams? Take a look at the traffic webcam network and choose your best route.
Answering machines? Sure, now even with video…
The list is endless – it’s a whole new world.. but where and when is it? We have the means, we just have to pool them together. Who volunteers?
Politics and/or Progress bring about wars. Wars bring about Progress. But then, Politics don’t bring about Progress directly – so we can never do without the Wars themselves.
The basic trait is this: if everything is running smoothly, do not progress. If you progress you might cause an imbalance, which can bring about war.
The problem is that politics themselves create imbalance, which then begets wars. During war, progress is then made to recover the imbalance and become an equal to or better than your adversary.And war doesn’t have to be violent, full-bloodied war.
Let’s consider telecommunications.
The telephone is something that can be found in every household and transports audio from one location to another via telephone wires. This idea was used to transfer data across such wires – but telephony had fewer requirements than data and an analog medium was enough – not so for digital communications. The next step was to change the medium: we have ADSL, Cable and now mobile technologies.
Notice the Progress:
Transport audio from one location to another via analog telephone wires.
Transport data from one location to another via analog telephone wires.
Transport data from one location to another via digital cabling or wireless.
How long will it take to complete the last step and make it as popular, as a necessity, as the first step has become in our daily lives?
Politics.
Yes – what? Make large companies such as BT, Maltacom crumble just for the sake of progress? What about employment, what about shares, what about votes?
And yet, what do we see in “futuristic” films, Back to the Future II just to mention one? A “phone call” actually consists of seeing your boss on your wall TV screen and hearing him firing you… Ok it’s not something you would want but focus on the technology: 2-way communication on your TV screen.
Look at our current situation: a solution exists for Web browsing where one can use the existing slow phone line to send commands, or rather URLs of webpages or data that is then sent down the fast cable medium to one’s TV via an appropriate TV set box.
TV. Television. Remote Vision. Where is it right now? Traditionally, an aerial on your building receiving data in the form of radio waves. Fine. Cable Television. For a higher price you can get digital video from a large selection of channels. Next. Satellite receivers can hook up onto an orbiting geostationary satellite and download digital video and audio data.
Ok. All this deals with reception. What about transmission? We all know that reception cost is less than transmission cost: of course – there is more demand for reception than for transmission: you want to see a movie to relax, not take all the hassle to make even one scene!
Transmission: hey have you heard of the Internet? It’s really easy to use and you can have your own virtual webspace where you can explain yourself to your clients and provide means on how to buy from you online even!
Technical people will tell you: yes it is very easy to create a static webpage once and for all. But maintaining a dynamic one which changes regularly is an ardous task.
And anyway who mentioned commercial transmission? I just want to see how my grandmother is – she can’t even read let alone use the mouse!
Fine. Let me mention something else: a webcam. Do you know how cheap a webcam is? You have a video camera already – even better: get a TV capture card – works the same.
Well?
Let’s throw all this into the cauldron, say the magic word and see what comes out shall we?
Turn on your TV. Sit on your couch. Grab your multi-purpose remote control. Press the number of your grandmother on the remote control: 123456789. On your TV you see a view into your grandmother’s kitchen and you can see her brewing some of your favourite soup. You can even hear her radio set. You put your remote control to your mouth, just like a handset, and press the call button. You see her putting the ladle by the side, go over to the radio set and turn the volume down. You then see her heading for her remote control, she presses a flashing button and puts her remote control against her face and answers you.
Your call turned on the TV set and is showing you through the webcam you have installed on your mantelpiece. You wave to her and her face brightens. You chat a bit. You show her the latest drawing your two-year old son has made and she loves it. Then you see her twitching her nose, and she turns round to the cooker. She leaves the remote control on the cupboard. A button at the back of the remote turns the handset to a speakerphone and you can hear her turning the cookerhood on….
Sounds nice doesn’t it? Of course some issues arise:
The webcam can control who can (relatives, family doctor) and cannot (thieves, anyone) look through the webcam. Firewalls?
The webcam will act like a webserver, acting on a well-known port. The client for this server will be the TV top device, using some common protocol. VDTP? (Visual Data Transfer Protocol).
The remote control will be a specialized mobile, which interacts with the TV top. It will have:
· Digits to type in the number to call
· A button to switch the TV of the client onto your webcam ( requesting an audience)
· The audio transmitted is in sync with the webcam and TV top device.
· A button at the back so when it is laid down it becomes a speakerphone.
All this cannot be used only for calling grandma. Here are some ideas:
Security: check your house from your place of work
Training: attend instructor-led lessons from home
Video-conferencing: nothing new.
Interactive TV anyone? How many more phone-in shows do we have to see to feel such a need? Why separate TV and phone? Why not into one?
Customer care? Call them at home and see how they are doing?
Over-the-phone help? Forget it, now the customer can show you the “broken down” iron and you can see that the knob is turned wrong.
Evil side? Violence? Pornography? Yes evil tends to seep into everything – but now no 12-year old can fool you into being an adult – you can see him from the webcam!
No more blind dates – see how your date looks like before meeting up.
Want to see the weather in Scotland before you pack your luggage? Tune in to a public weather webcam and check for yourself.
Afraid of traffic jams? Take a look at the traffic webcam network and choose your best route.
Answering machines? Sure, now even with video…
The list is endless – it’s a whole new world.. but where and when is it? We have the means, we just have to pool them together. Who volunteers?
Wednesday, October 19, 2005
Welfare State... Well.. not for me
Every month I pay NI from my monthly salary. This NI contribution is guaranteed not to be returned back to me as pension, since life on the Maltese islands doesn't give you that guarantee (my current NI is actually sustaining the aging population which is outliving their next generation). If it were only so...
Now I learn that foreigners with refugee status are being paid Lm150 a month, given a home and electricity, and all of this for free. Free to them, but not to us. Those Lm150 are coming from our taxes, from our NI contributions. Instead of giving me a better lifestyle (like better pavements so we don't break our legs, or better lighting in the streets so as not to run over my neighbour, or better tarmac for the roads so I don't swerve on the cyclist), money is being spent on a foreigner who comfortably enough asked for refugee status, and even though he is healthy and fit for work, he prefers the easy life being offered by the Maltese Government.
Some might point out that we must help others, the less fortunate. Sure! But let me do it out of my own will, not steal my contributions or taxes! If my taxes and NI contributions were going where theý're supposed to be going, then yes I'd be confident enough to give charities and donations. But knowing that my hard-earned money is being not invested, but wasted, then I have to intelligently save what's left for the actual purpose the contributions are supposed to be serving!
My pavement is non-existant. When contacted, the local council said they do not have enough funds to do our pavement. Sure! The funds are going to support the illegal immigrant who, whilst I work hard day and night, is leading a leisurely life strolling along the coast roads looking at the nice tourist ladies.
Back to work...
Now I learn that foreigners with refugee status are being paid Lm150 a month, given a home and electricity, and all of this for free. Free to them, but not to us. Those Lm150 are coming from our taxes, from our NI contributions. Instead of giving me a better lifestyle (like better pavements so we don't break our legs, or better lighting in the streets so as not to run over my neighbour, or better tarmac for the roads so I don't swerve on the cyclist), money is being spent on a foreigner who comfortably enough asked for refugee status, and even though he is healthy and fit for work, he prefers the easy life being offered by the Maltese Government.
Some might point out that we must help others, the less fortunate. Sure! But let me do it out of my own will, not steal my contributions or taxes! If my taxes and NI contributions were going where theý're supposed to be going, then yes I'd be confident enough to give charities and donations. But knowing that my hard-earned money is being not invested, but wasted, then I have to intelligently save what's left for the actual purpose the contributions are supposed to be serving!
My pavement is non-existant. When contacted, the local council said they do not have enough funds to do our pavement. Sure! The funds are going to support the illegal immigrant who, whilst I work hard day and night, is leading a leisurely life strolling along the coast roads looking at the nice tourist ladies.
Back to work...
Thursday, October 13, 2005
Illegal Immigrants to the Maltese Islands
For those of you (or rather, the most of you) who are unaware of what's going on in the Mediterranean island of Malta, here's a brief snapshot.
A densely populated island (1,100 ppl per sq km) is regularly receiving a weekly intake of on average a 100-200 african people coming in by boat with no documents, permits or anything. These come from countries like Somalia and Erithrea, but also from Egypt and Iran. Whilst many would have us think that these have crossed the Mediterranean sea on one boat (usually filled to the brim), their state of being strongly suggests that they were left there from a larger boat. One of the main departure sites is the nearby Libyan country - a country with strong ties to the Maltese people in the past... but one which is doing nothing to stop these illegal immigrations.
For those of you who think of me an immoral racist here's a shocker: I am a Christian with love for the human dignity, and I think Norman Lowell has some good points but is an extremist I would not like to see in power.
Now in the country there is much unrest about this - there are those who are afraid of the country losing its image to these foreign people: people with different complexion, religion, tradition, language, culture. Those who are afraid that the jobs of the lower-classes will be given out to these immigrants for cheap labor. Those who are afraid that these immigrants will out-breed us (Maltese families today have an average of 2 children per family - whilst immigrants sometimes arrive with newly born babies amongst them). Then on the other hand there are the ones who, attesting to their christian religion, are admonishing the rest of the country for being selfish, racist, immoral.
To be honest, my religion teaches me to share what I have with others in need. True, maybe these poor people are in misery, but maybe the thousands they paid for a boat trip to an illegal entry here in Malta might have been better spent? And then there is another problem: we DO NOT have land, not even for us - the prices of accomodation here in Malta are horrendous - so how can we share it with anybody else? We have educational problems - our teenagers are preferring online gaming to schooling, the level of education is decreasing - thus the demand for lower-class jobs is on the increase : we cannot allow foreign immigrants to take these jobs just because they afford to be paid cheaper!
Last but not least - calling us racist holds no grounds: one of the Maltese population's major fears of joining the EU was of Europeans coming over to stay in Malta - taking up precious housing space and jobs. To this effect Malta was given a 7-year special allowance to control such legal immigration. And then you go call our unacceptance of illegal immigration RACISM?
It's not because they're black, it's because its our country, our land, our job pool. No matter where they come from, we're not willing to give them away!
A densely populated island (1,100 ppl per sq km) is regularly receiving a weekly intake of on average a 100-200 african people coming in by boat with no documents, permits or anything. These come from countries like Somalia and Erithrea, but also from Egypt and Iran. Whilst many would have us think that these have crossed the Mediterranean sea on one boat (usually filled to the brim), their state of being strongly suggests that they were left there from a larger boat. One of the main departure sites is the nearby Libyan country - a country with strong ties to the Maltese people in the past... but one which is doing nothing to stop these illegal immigrations.
For those of you who think of me an immoral racist here's a shocker: I am a Christian with love for the human dignity, and I think Norman Lowell has some good points but is an extremist I would not like to see in power.
Now in the country there is much unrest about this - there are those who are afraid of the country losing its image to these foreign people: people with different complexion, religion, tradition, language, culture. Those who are afraid that the jobs of the lower-classes will be given out to these immigrants for cheap labor. Those who are afraid that these immigrants will out-breed us (Maltese families today have an average of 2 children per family - whilst immigrants sometimes arrive with newly born babies amongst them). Then on the other hand there are the ones who, attesting to their christian religion, are admonishing the rest of the country for being selfish, racist, immoral.
To be honest, my religion teaches me to share what I have with others in need. True, maybe these poor people are in misery, but maybe the thousands they paid for a boat trip to an illegal entry here in Malta might have been better spent? And then there is another problem: we DO NOT have land, not even for us - the prices of accomodation here in Malta are horrendous - so how can we share it with anybody else? We have educational problems - our teenagers are preferring online gaming to schooling, the level of education is decreasing - thus the demand for lower-class jobs is on the increase : we cannot allow foreign immigrants to take these jobs just because they afford to be paid cheaper!
Last but not least - calling us racist holds no grounds: one of the Maltese population's major fears of joining the EU was of Europeans coming over to stay in Malta - taking up precious housing space and jobs. To this effect Malta was given a 7-year special allowance to control such legal immigration. And then you go call our unacceptance of illegal immigration RACISM?
It's not because they're black, it's because its our country, our land, our job pool. No matter where they come from, we're not willing to give them away!
Wednesday, September 21, 2005
Rape of the Maltese Language
I am outraged by what is happening to my mothertongue! Reading the Maltese newspapers and watching Maltese TV only makes me retch at what we are being inherently taught.
Just today I saw an advert for a TV programme running on (if you plese!) the Education Channel, entitled "X'Anna Llejla?". The intended meaning is "What do we have tonight?" but the proper word for "we have" is "Ghandna" not "Anna"! What's written literally means "Which Anne tonight?"! And this on the EDUCATION Channel! PLEASE!
I have a friend who is a Maltese teacher and she said that the MAltese being taught is being written just as it is sounded. I also ehard that the students are finding it difficult to learn. Now that's splendid! Instead of improving our education, let's make it easier! And what respect is that to the mothertounge? Do we expect the French to throw away half their words because they're not sounded? Should the English type "immejitley" instead of "immediately"?
For heaven's sake, stop this lingual rape and get your education system sorted out!
Just today I saw an advert for a TV programme running on (if you plese!) the Education Channel, entitled "X'Anna Llejla?". The intended meaning is "What do we have tonight?" but the proper word for "we have" is "Ghandna" not "Anna"! What's written literally means "Which Anne tonight?"! And this on the EDUCATION Channel! PLEASE!
I have a friend who is a Maltese teacher and she said that the MAltese being taught is being written just as it is sounded. I also ehard that the students are finding it difficult to learn. Now that's splendid! Instead of improving our education, let's make it easier! And what respect is that to the mothertounge? Do we expect the French to throw away half their words because they're not sounded? Should the English type "immejitley" instead of "immediately"?
For heaven's sake, stop this lingual rape and get your education system sorted out!
Sunday, February 13, 2005
Relationships
A person is a person because it lives. It lives by being faced by problems, making decisions in trying to solve them, is faced by problems consequent to the decision... and all over again.
Had each person lived alone, then it wouldn't be such a problem: life problems would be only naturally-imposed or self-imposed problems. However, the person is not alone. It lives in a community made up of thousands of other individuals, each with its own problem-decision-consequence cycle.
This leads to the person having to face not only the nature and self-imposed problems, but also problems created by the decision-making (or lack of) of others. These may lead to confrontations between the two persons until either one of the two steps down, or a neutral agreement is reached.
The plot thickens when the two individuals love each other, 'love' in the 'care about' sense.
The decision-making becomes tougher: one will have to do away with decisions which might harm or somehow badly influence the other loved person. This narrows the choice, making a search for further alternatives necessary. At the end of it all, the final decision taken might still create a problem for the other loved individual, sending up in smoke all the pain taken by the decision-maker. A solution for the latter problem would be for the decision-maker to discuss all its available options with the other individual BEFORE making the actual decision, such that the best action is taken.
When couples go through a tough time, with their relationships going between caresses and hot arguments, they should check what type of decision-making are they adopting in their day-to-day life together: the first or the second? Preferably, the second type should be implemented, acknowleding the fact that this needs lots of open communication and sincerity.
Had each person lived alone, then it wouldn't be such a problem: life problems would be only naturally-imposed or self-imposed problems. However, the person is not alone. It lives in a community made up of thousands of other individuals, each with its own problem-decision-consequence cycle.
This leads to the person having to face not only the nature and self-imposed problems, but also problems created by the decision-making (or lack of) of others. These may lead to confrontations between the two persons until either one of the two steps down, or a neutral agreement is reached.
The plot thickens when the two individuals love each other, 'love' in the 'care about' sense.
The decision-making becomes tougher: one will have to do away with decisions which might harm or somehow badly influence the other loved person. This narrows the choice, making a search for further alternatives necessary. At the end of it all, the final decision taken might still create a problem for the other loved individual, sending up in smoke all the pain taken by the decision-maker. A solution for the latter problem would be for the decision-maker to discuss all its available options with the other individual BEFORE making the actual decision, such that the best action is taken.
When couples go through a tough time, with their relationships going between caresses and hot arguments, they should check what type of decision-making are they adopting in their day-to-day life together: the first or the second? Preferably, the second type should be implemented, acknowleding the fact that this needs lots of open communication and sincerity.
Women and Idols
Try as I might, I cannot perceive why females get so crazy about boys who look nice and sing. Being a boy doesn't help the understanding at all. I know it's something to do with their adolescence, but it looks stupid to me.
I mean, what's the difference between us boyfriends and them idols? Why is it that every wrong they do isn't condemnable while a small error from our part implies a thunderstorm? Why is it that whenever the girls see them, they melt and when they see us, it sometimes feels as if we didn't even exist?
Is it, maybe, that deep down they know the idols can never be theirs (and thus they won't be burdened by their troubles) while we are an eternal cross on their backs? Why does an idol's wink bring more joy than any gift we can ever present?
I go as far as comparing this girls' behavior to the boys' inclination of appreciation of the females' body without consideration of the person within.
The big difference is that they boys' act is morally and socially deplorable while the girls' acts are widely accepted and manifested en masse all over the world and through all media.
I suppose girlfriends totally detest it when their boyfriends fix their eyes on some sexy gal. May they know that us men feel as much, if not more, in a bad state when they melt at the sight of these idols.
God grant us to be happy with what we have. "Wish not another man's woman" was his 10th commandment. Is there room for the corollary?
I mean, what's the difference between us boyfriends and them idols? Why is it that every wrong they do isn't condemnable while a small error from our part implies a thunderstorm? Why is it that whenever the girls see them, they melt and when they see us, it sometimes feels as if we didn't even exist?
Is it, maybe, that deep down they know the idols can never be theirs (and thus they won't be burdened by their troubles) while we are an eternal cross on their backs? Why does an idol's wink bring more joy than any gift we can ever present?
I go as far as comparing this girls' behavior to the boys' inclination of appreciation of the females' body without consideration of the person within.
The big difference is that they boys' act is morally and socially deplorable while the girls' acts are widely accepted and manifested en masse all over the world and through all media.
I suppose girlfriends totally detest it when their boyfriends fix their eyes on some sexy gal. May they know that us men feel as much, if not more, in a bad state when they melt at the sight of these idols.
God grant us to be happy with what we have. "Wish not another man's woman" was his 10th commandment. Is there room for the corollary?
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